Precarious

Reminds me of the feeling of graduate school. The time to graduate is not entirely at your own control--a big difference from undergrad.

Exclusiveness is not rude

Nor should it be unreasonable. Truth itself is exclusive. It's as simple as 1+1=2, not 3. A father can deny his own son, or vice versa. But if he is truely the biological father, then everyone else has to be excluded from claiming that title. That's not rude because only he can be the one. Same goes for the argument of 'Christianity is a rude religion because it excludes every other religion from being true.' It simply can't stand. Now, if a religion is so inclusive that it accept even contradictory religions or idologies, then it must be a false religion.

I have nothing...

if I have no will nor hope.